The Land Of Having One Thing To Do

Last weekend, my English friend and I discussed why it is that the Spanish never seem to be in a rush, and how it is that everything moves so slowly.

For instance. I try to do everything ever in 2.4 hours to get it done to reach that perfect moment of completion as soon as possible. Because THEN I can relax. Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya, tomorrow. Work first, play later. Savoury, then dessert.

Spain is the other way around.

They start their day with dessert (everything here has sugar. Fresh orange juice is served with a sachet of sugar. And breakfast is a pastry. With sugar. And a coffee. With sugar). So they bypass the serious savoury route and cut to the chase.

Then, they perhaps discover that something needs to be done. They decide to do it tomorrow.

However, the day will inevitably come where they do have to take care of something. For instance, they might have to go to the bank. That is their one thing to do. And they will allot a day for such an activity.

When I have to go to the bank, which seeing as I still don't have my pin number is quite often, I try to fit it in between various classes, going to the post office, picking up my dry cleaning, having something to eat, doing some photocopying, getting my groceries, making 5 phone calls and meeting my intercambio (exchange student). I therefore allot 7.5 minutes to taking care of the necessary business in the bank.

A Spanish person decides that the pressing activity is to go to the bank. They therefore go to the bank. That is their one thing to do for that day.

"What did you do today, Juan?"
"I went to the bank."

And the reason for this? If you go to the bank, you will fall into a time warp where everything slows down to the extent where you almost forget not only why you're there, but also who you are and why you're bothering to stay alive. Two hours later, you may well have completed your task. You CANNOT just decide on the spur of the moment to go into the bank and 'quickly' withdraw money, or ask a question. If you go into the bank, there is no telling when you will come out again, if you will come again, and that if you do, you'll be the same person you were when you first entered. It is therefore imperative that you wake up, put on nice clothes, and allot the entire day to going to the bank. Only with that mentality will you survive the time warp scenario.

Example. My friend Becky who is my equal when it comes to thinking "Ah - must just pop in to the bank and....etc". After all we are English and used to a normal temporal experience. She 'popped in' to rectify a problem with her card with only 5 minutes to spare (first mistake). She queued up (Second mistake. Survival of the fittest theory would dictate she has 5 minutes to live). She eventually spoke to the nice lady behind the counter and asked to talk to someone who could help. The lady pointed vaguely at an area of the bank where 3 men were. After a little more probing, my perhaps overly polite English friend discerned who she needed to speak with. She approached the counter where a gentleman was on the phone. In Spanish, he was explaining to the person on the phone that "te quiero" (I want you literally, or liberally, I love you.). He was also doodling. Becky was right in front him. He continued to doodle. He wrote down a telephone number, which included the numeral 8, which he then proceeded to give a smiley face and spikey hair. He continued to say, "Si, te quiero" to the person on the phone. Becky sighed (in UK English this translates as 'FOR F*CK'S SAKE' and his changed his tone to present a more professional image. He then continued to give various facial expressions and hair styles to the remaining numerals he had scribbled down, by which time Becky gave up and went to work.

The same can be said of the post office. I went there at 5pm (in Spain the opening hours are 8am-2pm, 5pm-7pm more or less). At 5.20pm it was explained to me that Paulo would be along shortly but he was just having a coffee. The Spanish people in the queue behind me smiled and nodded and began to fidget with whatever they had in their hands, obviously content to wait for Paulo and his coffee fetish. I telephoned my friend in a bit of a temper, and he informed me that I have to understand that I'm in a country where it takes 30 minute to BUY A STAMP. And that's when it occurred to me.

Spain is a temporal disturbance.

No-one in their right mind would attempt to complete more than one such task in one day because it is impossible. Here, they don't try to get everything done to reach that moment of completion, of peace and perfection. They do not aspire for something so distant. They relax now, and worry about everything else tomorrow. Mañana, mañana.

Stressed out English people (and I suspect Americans) who desperately need to have everything done right now, will be sent here should St Peter reject them. You either slow down, or you leave the country in floods of tears.

But also, should you have an extra curricular activity, it will be the one thing you do. Becky just joined the gym. It is now assumed that she will go every night because it is what she does. Her friend has a baby. That is what she does. I want to go to Salsa class. But it will not understood that I also attend Spanish classes, give private lessons, prepare for my lessons, write blogs and stories, design and edit videos, as well as running a flat long distance.

It is the land of having one thing to do.

I'm beginning to like that idea. Why do we try to cram so much in. The more we do, the faster time goes. The only destination is death. So why hurry???

These guys have got it sussed. Slow down. Live right now. Worry tomorrow. I will not succumb to eating pure sugar for breakfast, however.