Mejor estar sola que mala acompañada

Better to be alone than with bad company.

How very true!

Today I ran a class teaching different expressions for generalizations and specific statements. In order to create a discussion, the subject to be discussed was the different characteristics of men and women - i.e. In general, women wish their husbands were more helpful. In general, men think about sex more than women. This is the subject that the course book uses and I was unsure about it, but today I felt it would be entertaining. And it really was.

My students (all men) were saying that in their experience the woman is unable to read a map. I explained that I have lived alone, travelled alone and worked in a job which requires reading maps (I used to travel around the UK frequently, visiting Higher Education conventions to recruit students and promote the university I worked for.) I said that I am a good driver and I'm not only proficient at reading maps - I enjoy it. I suggested that the dynamic of having a Spanish husband in the car may well make me feel like handing the map to him. But through necessity, I rely on myself. At which point they both reflected on several stressful journeys with their wives and said solemnly,

"Mejor estar sola que mala acompañada."

I agreed and felt sorry for them, inwardly enjoying my terminal singleness and its benefits.

However, as far as sexism is concerned, the gentlemen determined that Spanish men are no way near as bad as Italian men for having a certain attitude towards women. I cannot comment because I've only met Spanish men. And they have always been gentlemanly (compared to the creatures in the UK, which isn't saying much).

We then read a passage of text about how 6 women and 6 men were 'tested' with multi-tasking. These 'guinea pigs' had to make coffee, toast some bread, take a phone message, wash up and pack a briefcase within ten minutes. Apparently, with one exception, the men were all worse than the women. I looked up at the guys. One was frowning intently at the text and pondering. The other looked at me with big eyes and horror on his face, and with the utmost sincerity said, "diez minutos????". Awww. I told them that is pretty much how I start every day!

We then looked at a group of words and had to 'generalise' about which ones would be more important to a man or a woman. These words included; sex, chocolate, shopping, sport, TV remote control addiction, expressing feelings, sense of direction.

"For men, I think sex!" declared one of them very seriously.

I sat back and admired his honesty, as he proceeded to give a list of 'statistics' saying that heterosexual couples may have sex 10 times, lesbians 2 times and gays 50 times. Times per what (a month, a year, a decade, a day) I've no idea but I understood what he was trying to say. Not sure if there's the remotest truth in this but MY GOD it was funny.

At the end of the day, as long as they're speaking English, they can say what they want. Even one student, who I thought was giving details of a lovely white beach in south-east Spain. I suddenly realised, as he continuously tried to modify what he was saying (after gaging my incomprehension) that he was actually giving me tips on where to go for white communities. I couldn't believe it. I left England to explore different communities! And apart from anything else, compared to Senorita Invierno, this guy is practically black! Mind you, compared to me everyone is. I have the complexion of a milk bottle. But really, for someone with skin the colour of 'cafe con leche' as my Spanish friends happily describe themselves (though I suppose olive-skinned may be more appropriate) it seems strange that he prefers 'white' communities. Never mind.

My students could be plotting world domination and I'd just have to be delighted that they were doing it with correct grammar. Though in the light of recent events I suppose we must all be vigilant. Just awful.

On a lighter note, I was explaining to my classes this week that the theory is the world language will most likely be Chinese in a few hundred years. They looked a bit concerned. I took the liberty of teaching some basic phrases to get them started (so not in my contract!) and said, "Hey, it could be worse, it could be Catalan!".

They loved that. The idea of Catalan being the language of the Terran Empire. Absurd.