Spiderman 3

Is the most retarded thing I've ever seen.

If you want to see 'turning to the dark side through emotional pain' actually done well (with brilliant acting and an excellent script), I refer you to Buffy T.V.S. and the character of Willow, played expertly by Alyson Hannigan.

Is the guy who turns into Spiderman (I've forgotten his name, oddly enough) supposed to be really stupid? Is this film supposed to have a main character that a 2yr old can identify with? E.G. Someone hurt me and now I'm angry. I'm going to hurt them back. Oops. Shouldn't have done that. I made it worse. OK, now I'm going to be nice. This is an adult male!!!! HELLO!! He's supposed to be a hero and he behaves like a troubled teenager and we're supposed to care. And you can tell when he's being bad - his slicks his hair down and wears eyeliner.

It marries the intellectual message of The Care Bears (be nice to each other) with scene after scene of random violence. As a piece of animation it's very good. As a story it's very weak. As a film it's just a massive waste of money that glorifies the ego - selfishness, vanity, revenge done really, really badly. I didn't care about any of the characters at any point - except for the girl occasionally who gave quite a lovely performance. Until they stuck her in a web in a car and had her scream pathetically and wait to be rescued.

40 years ago we were making television which attempted to re-evaluate how certain people are viewed in society. Now, women are still screaming because they're in peril, or looking like super models (or both) and everyone is cock-asian. I know this is comic book stuff but either make it suitably stylised (performances included) or make it naturalistic. Dick Tracy is a good example of a comic book movie that has been stylised.

What a load of old shit.

Mind you, don't know what I expected! Just thought it would be fun. I enjoyed X-Men because I love the story of the mutants (again, sci fi metaphors for racism and intolerance - great stuff) and just thought this would be as good. Mind you, X-Men 3 was also really bad. Just effects and violence.

Effects and violence. The story can be utter crap but it is all about the effects and the macho violence.

I'm going to go and listen to the radio for a bit and see if I can restore some brain cells.

Oh, the guy in the film said, "it's our choices who makes us who we are." That's such an un-original line. How did the writer get away with that?

Bring on Harry Potter and OOTP - at least we know it is better written and time billion times more complex.